Three Things I'm Grateful For
But I digress…November 2024
I need to begin by acknowledging the possibility that preaching gratitude forces a sort of toxic positivity on people who aren’t ready to receive it. I heard this on a Brené Brown podcast some years ago.
But… this week is Thanksgiving here in the U.S., so here I am with a platter of gratitude for your consumption. If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I post a reel every morning while the dogs and I engage in the first of our daily walkabouts. I call it my “morning musing,” and I riff on whatever I happen to be thinking about as I start my day. Over a year ago, I started to include “gratitude Wednesday” as a way to share my practice of gratitude with others. It landed on a Wednesday, because on one particular Wednesday in 2023, I went through a surgery that I’d been afraid of, and successfully came out the other side.
On one not-long-ago Wednesday, I could barely muster the energy to get out the door to record a reel, much less find anything to be grateful for. After pondering a bit, I found gratitude for having learned about stoicism. I’ve written previously about the concept of “Amor Fati”—the love of fate, and on that particular Wednesday, I dug in deep to try to express it in a way that felt authentic.
Not easy by any means.
But… by the end of the day, I felt much better. Not in a Pollyanna sort of way, but in an ability to sit with profound discomfort and be okay with current circumstances. Now, what works for me, may not work for you, so I encourage you to think about what would work as self care for you, and then jump on it!
It can be as easy as buying yourself a little treat…
Now… looking ahead to Thanksgiving… I thought I’d share three things I’m grateful for at the moment.
1. Vulnerability
I know this one sounds weird, but hear me out. By writing my book and sharing it far and wide, I basically ripped myself wide open for the world to see. Readers called me brave, but in the end, the catharsis it provided for me personally was well worth the pain I endured while putting the words down on paper.
But that wasn’t the end of the road, not by a long shot.
Me being vulnerable in a very public way encouraged numerous others to do the same, by sharing their own stories with me—both privately and in front of others during book club meetings and during my presentations.
Which brings me to the second thing I’m grateful for:
2. Community
Last month, the dogs and I road-tripped to Wisconsin to celebrate some sixtieth birthdays. Hard to believe we’re all in that zone! The weather was perfect. The highlight was a couple of wonderful visits with people I didn’t know all that well. One was with a woman I’d gone to high school with forty years ago! While at the time we were friendly, I wouldn’t say we were good friends. After high school, we went our separate ways, until reconnecting via Facebook. She was a very early and kind supporter of my book, so I wanted to spend some time catching up with her. It was a remarkable visit, one I hope to write about soon.
The other visit was with someone I really didn’t know at all. She’s married to a college friend of mine. We planned for the three of us to get together, but at the last minute, my friend couldn’t make it. While I’d have loved to have seen him, I was delighted to have such an extraordinary conversation with her. She demonstrates a courage and wisdom to which I was fortunate to be exposed. As we parted ways, she commented: “I took a chance coming here and I’m so glad I did.”
I couldn’t have agreed more.
3. Opportunity
Have you heard the quote “if you don’t ask, the answer is always no?”
I’ve been asking about presenting Crossing Fifty-One at libraries, and just recently, I’ve received two YES responses! One is close to home at the Big Lake Library on Monday, February 10th and the other is through the Fort Worth Historical Society/Library on October 11th! I’m super excited to share my book with more readers.
Another great opportunity has been the continued publication of my essays in the Minnesota Star Tribune. I’m calling myself a “regular contributor,” which has a nice ring to it! Here’s my latest about my work in community engagement with the City of Minneapolis.
What are you grateful for? Share it in the comments!
See you next month!
~ Debbie
Three great things I found this month:
Skip this if you don’t want any more post-election analysis. But perception was a key element, and understanding that can help all of us move forward.
Oliver Burkman writes a great newsletter called The Imperfectionist and here’s a post I found that presented a great way to move forward when you have tons to do and don’t know where to start,
Normally I wouldn’t share a video, but this one warmed my heart as a perfect example of the joy that follows overcoming fear.
Writing/Book Updates:
I’m very excited to share that I’ve hired a narrator to produce an audiobook version of Crossing Fifty-One! I was motivated by those of you who told me you mostly, or even exclusively consume audiobooks. Cassandra Parker, my narrator/producer, is amazing and I can’t wait for the launch, which is tentatively scheduled for sometime in January.
If you’re interested in being part of my launch team, reply to this email! I’ll have a few promo codes to share with team members.
Also, if you haven’t had a chance to rate or review Crossing Fifty-One, you can do so right HERE. Every rating or review helps boost the book in the vast world of Amazon, which is where I get most of my sales.
NOVEMBER PODCAST RECOMMENDATION:
Just in time for the holidays! Understanding loved ones who may be suffering from personality disorders or other mental health issues can make family gatherings much more tolerable:
NOVEMBER BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS:
Fiction: The Family Fang by Kevin Wilson
“You think we damaged you? So what! That’s what parents do.”
Yikes! But that’s sort of the point of this book, which takes turns being hilarious and heartbreaking. Just the sort of warmup you need for the holidays!
Nonfiction: The Gratitude Diaries by Janice Kaplan
Did you know that studies show that the person expressing gratitude toward another benefits even more than the recipient? The author does a good job of describing her year-long experiment with being more grateful and the surprising results.
